The Law of Attraction for Realists
What if The Secret wasn’t total bullshit?
I’m a pretty open-minded person. Throughout my 27 journeys around the sun, I’ve experimented with a lot of modalities in personal growth. Some have stuck and continue to enrich my life. Others, not so much.
Falling into the latter category is practicing the law of attraction, popularised by Rhoda Byrne in her perennial best-seller, The Secret. The basic premise is that you get whatever it is you think about most.
For example, if you’re walking around consumed by worry over your financial situation, Byrne suggests you’re likely to manifest more debt. Conversely, by intentionally filling your mind with thoughts of financial abundance, you’re likely to turn things around.
Sounding wishy-washy? That’s because it is.
I’m not here to bash anyone else’s work. I could never match Mark Manson’s blistering critique of The Secret even if I tried. But it has to be said — even the most open-minded among us will struggle to not catch a whiff of bullshit in Byrne’s premise.
In fact, I’m here to see if I can pull The Secret’s head out of the clouds and ground it in the practical.
What if the law of attraction wasn’t as far-fetched as it seems? What if we could base our belief in Byrne’s work on concrete evidence instead of the debatable benevolence of the universe?
My thinking is that it isn’t and that we can. And what better to help me make my case than trusty old neuroscience?
The Reticular Activation System
The human brain has been called the most complex object in the known universe. All of your memories, skills, neuroses, and talents are all stored in that incredible network of neurons that lives between your ears.
Yet, despite its immense capacity for learning and remembering, your brain is primarily a filtration device.
In every moment of your life, you are inevitably exposed to innumerable stimuli. Some scientists estimate that 11 million bits of information come flooding through our senses every second, while our conscious minds can only process 50.
The brain literally can’t handle everything that’s being thrown at it, so it has to filter out anything that isn’t deemed important or necessary. This is where the RAS comes in.
The RAS allows the brain to ignore meaningless stimuli while remaining sensitive to other inputs. It filters incoming sensory stimuli and redirects them to the cerebral cortex, influencing our state of physiological arousal and alertness.
Ever noticed that when you’re looking to buy a new car, you start seeing your preferred make and model more and more?
Or that when you’re feeling lonely, you seem to see couples everywhere?
This is your RAS at play. By focusing on what you want — a new car, or a partner — you’re telling your brain what is important. Your brain then responds by filtering out competing stimuli and heightening your awareness of the things that seem to matter most.
With a heightened awareness of what matters most to us, we’re more likely to see opportunities. We’re then more likely to make proactive decisions to reach our desired outcomes.
Sounds useful. What if we could guide it?
Questions Are The Answer
Another interesting quirk about the human brain is that it cannot stand open loops. And the ultimate open loop is an unanswered question.
When someone asks you a question, your brain jumps into a mental reflex known as instinctive elaboration.
If I was to ask you what color your front door is, your thinking would immediately be hijacked. You wouldn’t consciously begin to work on the problem — your brain would go straight to the answer.
When the brain has been posed a question, it has to find an answer.
Taking steps towards the life you want is admittedly a little more complex than telling me the color of your front door, but we can apply the process of instinctive elaboration intentionally by asking the right questions.
The right questions tell our brain what is most important to us. They direct our focus, and our brain goes to work filtering out stimuli that are irrelevant in our search for an answer.
You might try this in the morning, asking yourself some questions specific to your goals to prime your mind for the day ahead.
I saw a tweet recently from Greg McKeown, author of Essentialism. It was a simple image posing a question; “What is the best and highest use of today?”
Imagine what you could accomplish by asking yourself that same question every morning. Your brain would instinctively elaborate towards an answer, highlighting and prioritizing the tasks required to move you towards your desired outcome.
Using the RAS in conjunction with instinctive elaboration might not be as romantic as believing in a benevolent universe manipulating circumstances to manifest your every desire.
And hey, maybe the universe really is conspiring to give each of us whatever it is that occupies our thoughts most of the time. Who am I to suggest otherwise?
Either way, you already have everything you need to shape your perception of the world around you and move toward your goals in a very real way.
All you need to do is ask the right questions, and pay attention.
